Saturday, September 20, 2008

Lonely People

Last night I visited with the stars. We met at the old playground and listened to music as I stared at their unfamiliar constellations. My back felt the cool, damp wood with each breath of sea breeze I took. “Hello stars,” I whispered into the night air. Palm branches swayed to the rhythm of my song as the clouds passed between us like ghosts lit by moonlight. It was then I realized I envied their stationary brightness. Stars are simply stars. They glow. I, on the other hand, feel far from any sort of “simply.”

I’ve now listened to “Eleanor Rigby/Julia” a minimum of eight times straight. I have yet to fully comprehend what Father McKenzie’s deal is, or why Julia is featured in the song title, but I feel sorry for Eleanor Rigby. I wish I could have been her friend. Then I would have been at her funeral. And about the lonely people--I know where they come from. I’m one of them.

Everyone is lonely for something, or someone. We’re in constant search of fulfillment, a cause to fight for, a purpose--for our own needs as well as others, as if to say, “I belong in this place.” Rob Bell said, “Some people are looking for a fight because they aren’t in one.” I don’t want to be like that. I want to stand for and love things for what they mean to me, truly. As cliché as this may sound, I’ve had a need to “find myself” for a long while now. I want to have an opinion without being influenced by someone else. I want to write without worrying what other people will think. I want to live outside connections and past relationships. I wish to live my life, not for the sake of anyone, not to impress other people who are lonely themselves, not by competition, but for me and for my God. I need to let go.

So this is me as simply as I can be, fully Jaimie Nicole Myaing, no outside influences: I’ve decided I like to paint. You may not call me a painter, but I like it, so I will do it. I also like to draw. I have a sketchbook and the paper doesn’t judge me. I danced under the moon tonight. My skirt made like a flower as I twirled. Dancing has always been freeing for me. Poetry. I am in love with it and will someday create a book that will be home to my poems. I have, as of a few months ago, cared quite a bit for the earth. We should take care of it. Not as a fad to “live green,” but seriously. Speaking of earth, I love to explore its vast lands and discover its many cultures. Traveling is beyond one of the best things I’ve experienced. They say I should be into politics--I’m not. I may be the furthest thing from a musician, but I am more and more a lover of music. I hold pride in my heritage and wish and pray for peace in Burma, as well as peace for all the lonely people in our very lonely nation. I fancy the idea of someday joining the Peace Corps. As of yet, I have no idea what my next step in life is and as of yet, I’m very okay with that.

These are the things I care about, the things I love, and the things I hope for. I am a poet, a painter, a dancer, lover of music, caretaker and traveler of earth, in waiting of peace.

So where do the lonely people, like you and me, belong? We belong here--continually searching for good, in pursuit of peace, in constant practice of love, as proclaimed individuals, hopefully without a need to impress.







Letting Go.

Thursday, September 4, 2008

Tidbits of Majuro

What we wish we could wear in public, we wear to bed. These items of clothing took up valuable space in our suitcases. They will be worn.


I am thankful to be in Delap where we get a breeze that blows away mosquitoes and relieves us from heat. Within ten minutes of being in Laura, the other side of Majuro, I had a bagillionkatillion bug bites. Yes, that became a real number after my experience.

Cockroaches definitely do fly and geckos are my new best friend as they eat these pesky flying devils.

Baby Gecko
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I have the craziest, quirkiest, funniest, most laughable, entertaining, palest girl on Majuro for a roommate. We make the fun. And sometimes unintentionally match.


























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Fresh coconuts don’t taste as good as “coconut” flavored things. Nor do they smell as nice. And they’re not as easily cracked open in real life as they are in movies.
If not for their use as key hideaways and the closest things to pets I can keep, they’d be an all-around disappointment.

Meet Mushoo and Monessa Chung



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Out of all the guys on Majuro, I am most attracted to Pete, and I don’t think he wants me. Sad day.

Pete
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The sunsets are beautiful here. The sunrises would be just as beautiful if they weren’t at 6:00 am.







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Tape on glasses makes you a nerd in America. In Majuro, this is a very “in” thing to do. Especially when it’s pink duct tape.

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When swimming with flippers minus “booties,” do not hesitate to loosen the too-tight strap around heels. Failure to do so will result in much pain.




















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During our days off, we spend way too much time at the resort using the internet, drinking way too much iced tea, adding way too much Splenda.




Today’s count: six hours, nine glasses, eighteen Splendas. And still counting.